Day 34 - August 18th

Day 34 - August 18th
Crazy acid and mushrooms melting my brain
No communication
Beers
Can't think about anything
Not drinking not an option

        I think the best way to stop doing something isn't to try to stop, you have to replace the vice with something – a life, ideally. I drink for a bunch of different reasons, from boredom to excitement to anxiety – and of course because it's real fun – but in trying not to drink and setting myself this challenge at the start of the year, I think I missed the point a little. Like, why did I want to drink less? I said it was because of the hangovers, but I still drink to this day, and I still get hangovers. That's definitely not stopped me.
        The trick to stopping isn't to try and win some battle of willpower with yourself – I always lose those anyway – the trick is to find something that you care about more than drinking – or smoking or gambling or taking drugs or whatever – that will force you into a decision.
        For me right now, the decision is between drinking and stand up. If I stay out all night on Thursday, and Friday and Saturday, and maybe through Sunday, I'll be burning through time and energy that I could be using on stand up. I'll be hungover through the day when I should be writing, and I'll bail on gigs because someone's asked me to come down the pub and get started on the evening. Drinking is incredible, it's so much fun, and if I didn't have stand up to worry about I'd definitely be out every night I could find company, but luckily for me I stumbled upon something that I could care about more than drinking. Stand up: I love it.

        I have no idea what happened on August the 18th, 2012, but I know that what was happening in a larger sense in my life around this time was that I was in the process of falling in love with stand up. The screaming into the microphone thing was one of the first bits of evidence that I'd started spending time in my day trying to solve the problems I encountered every time I got on stage. That's one thing that's great about stand up, there's always a new problem to solve and more ways to get better. Something else to think about. It never ends. It's like drinking: exciting every time, only with stand up there's no hangover.

Click here to read the next part - Day 35 - August 29th